upon arriving home from work this morning, and walking into my humble abode, i was hit by a wall of poo smell.
“oh.my.gosh. did the dog poo?” i asked.
“no, that was us, we have just all been pooing this morning.” replied one of my poo smelling children.
i took matters into my own non-smelling poo hands and got the matches to light the candles.
i still had my stocking hat on, which my hair lives vicariously through, so it has braids.
somehow, in the process of striking the match, it broke in half, flew end over end, and landed on my hat.
therefore, catching my hat on fire.
while still on my head.
“@#$%” i said, while sucking in smoke, ripping my hat off my head.
“what happened?” my poo smelling child asked.
“i just set myself on fire!!”
she just stared at me.
things i learned while on fire, although briefly.
1) i could never be a smoker, just the one mouthful and my dreams of sexy smoking were over.
2) it is only 2 days into the new year and i have already set myself on fire.
it is going to be one helluva year.