today was bear’s well-child, well-check, wellness (what do they call it anyways?) physical.
shots were invovled…..three shots to be exact.
as we, bear and i, sat in the room waiting for the nurse to come in, bear pulled his shirt down and said ‘skull’
apparently he felt inking would make him man-up so i drew a skull on his chest.
he ran out into the hall to find a mirror and check the new tatt.
next he came in and pulled up his shirt to show the small of his back and said ‘bear’
so i inked his name.
again the same pilgrimage to the hall mirror to check the tatt.
he was ready for the needles or the prison yard.
i told him what would happen, it would hurt, and it is ok to be afraid.
all was well until bear saw the shots hit the counter……
“potty? potty? got to go potty?” he immediately said. so out the room, down the hall, locked in the bathroom he went.
back in the room the nurse attempted to swab his arm, he immediately took the swab, swabbed his own arm told her ‘thank you’ while handing it back, then tried to leave the room.
i said no, you have to get your shots.
“poop? gotta go poop?” he said trying to head out the door again. i shut the door and said ‘no can do.’
after this bear was like a hamster running for his life in a little room with the nurse still trying to swab his arm.
“do you think we will need help?” the nurse asked.
let me think, the last time we had to draw blood, it took 4 people to hold him and the phlebotomist to draw the blood………..i am leaning towards the affirmative in the help department.
“i’ll go get some help.” she said as she walked out the door.
she came back in with, and i swear this, doogie howser md. “do you think we’ll need more help?” he asked.
“yes.” was my immediately response upon seeing his neck was the size of my arm; one more woman came in.
odds were still in bear’s favor.
we got him up on the table and told him to lay down at which point bear says “get the ropes.”
in the end 2 more adults were brought in with me included making it 5 adults and one nurse giving the shot.
“MOM!!” he yelled for help, then realized i was part of the problem yelled “URSULA MOM!”
he was clearly insulting me. after the last shot was administered, band-aide applied and bear let off the table, he looked at the floor where wrappers and plastic were strewn and 6 adults all looking back at him and……….he…..laughed…..at…..us.
on the way home i noticed the battery light suddenly shine brightly on the dashboard,by the time i told the hubby on the phone ‘the battery light……” i lost all power in the dashboard.
then the motor decided to not be left out of the fun and quit too.
“i’ll call you back.” i told the hubby because although it is totally safe to talk on the cell phone and drive it is whole ‘nother ball of wax to talk and manuver a disabled vehicle off the freeway.
i would clearly need to be texting instead.
i coasted off the freeway, then was able to chug to a 7-11 gas station where i asked the clerk, who by the way was indian and made me believe, once again, that 7-11 is racial profiling against every other nationality who applies for a job. he kindly told me no, but pointed to the very next building which happened to be a jiffy lube……what luck!!!
as i walked into the bay doors i saw the other luckiest thing of my day, a midget waiting to help me.
thank you baby Jesus.
i was totally looking around for the ‘little people big world’ cameras.
we got back on the road after a jump from my little friend and made it 20 miles? when i again lose power.
what is the use of hazard lights when they are completely useless without power? the semi-truck behind me was thinking this same thing.
blinkers are totally useless as well.
i once again coasted off the freeway, into a parking lot and admitted defeat as no midget came to my rescue a second time.
so what am i grateful for today?
that it is over.