a new study on nature vs nurture

now,

nature wise,

there is no part of the hubby involved in making the queen.

in fact, there was 1600 miles between the two of them when that little spark was lit.

so riddle me this:

how did she even get his dimple in the exact same spot?

built like him,

walks like him,

destroys like him……

they even possess the same magical force field that never allows their butt crack to be covered,

not matter how high the pants start,

it magically fights its way out.

she is him,

and he is her.

so scientists around the genetic world,

explain how the hubby DNA somehow got in the queen DNA.

nature?

or

nurture?

a shocking realization:

“mom? what is our address?”

“hmmmm……….? you don’t know?”

“no, i need it to tell my friend so she can come over to work on our history project.”

“o….k….. i will write it down.”

“thanks.”

i sincerely hope my 14-year-old never gets lost,

we may never see him again.

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a magic trick

“mom, i can pull your nose right off.” chicka informed me.

before i could get the word ‘really’ out,

she had my nose between her two knuckles and YANKED.

hard.

“see!!??” she said proudly displaying her thumb between the two knuckles, “i have your nose.”

i looked because i was fairly certain she did have my nose between her two knuckles.

“oh chicka, you don’t actually try to pull the nose off, it hurts when you do!” i said rubbing my very red nose.

“really?” she said as she grabbed her own nose and yanked just as hard.

“OUCH!!! you were right!!”

sadly, chicka’s magic career started and ended on the same day.

the best kiss ever

i watched this movie this weekend.

i happen to think it has the best kiss in a movie.

she and him are friends.

she gets dumped by her boyfriend.

calls her friend.

they go to the new year’s eve party,

she sees the ex with another woman she did not know existed.

that is the basic set up.

what is, in your opinion,

the best on screen kids you have seen?

i would love to know.

why i was not clickety clacking yesterday

how do you spell MAN-ual labor?

double-u-oh-em-e-en….

and i’ll say it again and again and again.

that’s right baby,

one trench 36 ft long,

3 ft deep,

2 ft wide,

except at beginning and end,

dug.

by me.

but the hubby had the miserable job of jack hammer.

i felt bad for him by the end of the day.

new line being put in today.

hopefully,

flushing toilets whenever we want by evening.

I LOVE RUNNING WATER!!!!!

just not in our basement.

toodles ladies.

off to flex my biceps.

things that make you go hmmm……

i live in a VERY conservative, religious state.

we, in happy valley,

are considered the reddest of the red in terms of conservatism.

also we are one of the most religious,

and youngest marrying age median in the US.

doubt me?

i just read that little statistic today,

our median age for marriage is 23.5 years of age.

i won’t print falsehoods on this site,

i can’t.

it would not be religious or conservative to do so.

so, imagine my surprise when we moved down here and heard a ruckus over the school mascot.

you see,

we are the red devils.that’s right,

lucifer himself.

tonight we went to the homecoming parade and to watch the lighting of the ‘S’

you know what these crazy conservatives light the ‘S’ with?

a flaming pitchfork.

a DEVIL’S pitchfork that is….

i even saw babies carried on their father’s shoulders with devil horns on!!

now is that something that is religious OR conservative?

i don’t know.

let’s ask ann coulter i figure she’s got the pulse on all thing fanatical.

and it must work,

she is richer than i will ever be.

a conversation with the hubby

“you know you already do this.”

i was sitting in the hubby’s office visiting with him looking at the current book he is reading.

THE 80/20 PRINCIPLE

the catch line is the following:

“how to get more done by doing less”

the book is over 200 pages long.

“what am i already doing?” he asked.

“the whole getting more done by doing less concept. in fact, you started doing that the day you married me.”

i was just getting rolling.

“IN FACT, i could make this book one profound sentence of truth, justice, and best selling material.”

are you ready for this?

here is my catch line,

and whole book:

“the 80/20 principle, get more done by doing less. find a woman, make her your wife, the principle is complete.

thank you, thank you,

i’ll be here all week.

i haven’t been to school all week

evidently they have found a miracle named cody for bear.

he is bear’s one-on-one aide this week.

unfortunately,

cody is gone for the next 3 weeks.

fortunately, today is swim day at BYU for bear.

bear is actually a fish disguised as a bear.

unfortunately, it will not be swim day every day for the next 3 weeks.

why i weep in my pillow

it is not often i get obsessed with a tv show.

most of the ones i get obsessed with get canceled.

like this one:hot vampire private detective.

what could go wrong?

then this one:one episode had kristin chenoweth, in a nunnery, finding a stash of maxi pads that weren’t allowed and stealing them saying “i have something to do.”

AGAIN….

what could go wrong?

evidently i have sophisticated taste.

so now my newest obsession is this:

i

love

this

show.

given my track record of loving shows that get cancelled,

i don’t feel i can miss one second of ANY episode.

the hubby scheduled his ecclesiastical meeting during all 9,600 seconds of it.

oh

no

he

did

not.

see Glee,

is during bath time.

i had 4 kids to get scrubbed.

there are 66 stairs round trip from top floor to basement,

where the TV is.

i ran these at least 10 times tonight.

for the first time,

i was wishing for longer commercial breaks.

to add some extra excitement,

i had to turn the TV up extra loud.

why?

because the industrial fans are blowing to try to keep the carpets dry.

it is not working.

queen pooed in the tub.

oh

yes

she

did.

bear, pooed his pants.

while sitting on his commodewith the seat down of course.

oh

yes

he

did.

then,

finding little poop pellets that fell out of his underwear,

on my new throw rug,

i have had for 4 days now,

he rubbed his foot in it,

thinking it was not poo.

start

the

cry

track

now.

people,

this is why i weep.

not for hungry children around the world.

oh no.

for me.