ode to sports bras

boob A and boob B

like to get so jiggly

until you came along

and sang your sweet song

holding them tight

as they begin to take flight

how can i live without you?

how can i give you your just dues?

i can think of the ways

the boobies like to sway

without your hugging fit

there is a word

that would got so well

but don’t worry

i won’t us it

alas, i seem to have lost mine

and so boob A and boob B

must sadly pine

for the comfort that comes

when their sweet freedom

is tightly confined

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today……what do you mean it is barely past morning!?!?

half asleep horny hubby at 4 am

vomit (not my own)

dr. appointment

weeding garden

bird tying herself to door knob and getting stuck

(i am proud of her tying skills)

little neighbor kid

nice kid

relentless kid

snacks

food

breakfast

lunch

still have house work

and i still have at least 11 more hours to my day

when will time stop moving at warp speed?

today i pulled a hair out of the mole on my arm

plucked hair from under my chin

and keats told me i needed to shave

my upper lip

he is my un-favorite child today

but that is not the worst

i am heavier right now than i have been in a long time

my gut is looking like when i am first preggers

it likes to get a jump start

and my butt

not to be left behind

(no pun intended)

catches up with the gut

immediately

i need exercise

badly

my psyche needs excercise

i try to find time

in the morning?

i am already up at 4 am

home by 5:30ish

can’t go

bear is up early and hubby leaves at 6:30-0700

let’s see……..

when hubby gets home?

running in the 90’s?

yeah, i don’t think so either

evening?

monday: sir’s softball game

tuesday: bird’s kickball, chicka’s baseball, maybe hubby game (it is tourney time you know)

wednesday: chiccka’s last game, keat’s religification (he has decided to be baptized. we never forced the issue, he just thought it was time)

thursday: bird’s last kickball game

friday: keat’s continued religification, religified, holified, pentacostal, and what ever else i can think of

evenings right now are when i can go

i got dressed to go tonight

started walking out the door at 8:30 when hubby says

“what time are you back?”

“why?”

“i have a game”

“dammit!!!!”

i need time people

i need time to mourn the fact that:

1. hair mole

2. chin hair that needs plucking

3. obvious mustache

4. preggers gut

5. butt trying to keep up with gut

6. bear shite, shat, poo-pooed, stinkied his pants just as i was trying to leave

7. PMS

8. lack of sleep

9. how can one properly feel sorry for themselves unless completely alone?!

10. the kicker…..i have a zit on the left side of my nose!!!!

at the rate i am going

this will be me by fall

i don’t know why i get so mad

i don’t know why i get so mad

when people

sleep

i mean everyone should get the chance

why should i begrudge them of

sweet

lucisous

refreshing

sleep?

my hubby put in a long few days

he was tired

i tried to lay down for a quick nap yesterday

so did he

at the same time

not a good idea with our kids

he fell asleep last night

and i put the kids to bed

i got up to do the route

but he came out and said he would

then came home to sleep

until just about 10 am

bear was up before 6 am

with each passing

sleep filled

minute

my hubby was getting

i was getting more and more irritated

i am irritated now

i am TIRED

so childish

i know

but this is how i feel

one day i will sleep

but i am afraid of the curse my father suffers from

he said when he wanted to sleep

he could not

too busy with kids and life

now that we are all gone

he cannot

what a terrible nightmare

chicka’s observation

as we were walking home from HV

that would be hollywood video at our house

which knows us well

starting when queen threw

hunchback of notre dame

in the provo river

and we had to replace it

expensive

the start of a beautiful relationship

with us and HV

anyhoo

chicka was walking behind queen

observing her behind

when chicka said

“does every one’s butt do that?

“do what”

“you know move up and down in different directions”

she followed me for a bit

i was uncomfortable at the close scrutiny

“yours does! now look at mine”

she raced ahead so i could watch her butt

“why yes it does!”

“HMMMM! i did not know this”

well

now she does

my unfavorite child for the day

today bird informed me that my dress makes my stomach

look like a baby belly

yeah,

good luck coming back from that one bird

another sunday

another church done

another GFF started

no peeing on church pews

floors

or

gym

God Bless Us Everyone

you think i would run out of tears

today

bear had a melt down

that lasted 4 hours

but that is not the reason i cried

today

he punched me so hard

his knuckles left imprints

but that is not why i cried

today

he drew blood in multiple spots

but that is not why i cried

today

he climbed on his bed

just to unscrew a light bulb

just to smash it

against his door

but that is not why i cried

today

he tried to break his bedroom window

but that is not why i cried

today

he hurt

emma

but that is not why i cried

today

after i had to physically restrain

on the ground

call for family help

to get us home

bear

sobbing with a broken heart

said

“please mom, i am trying to be my best self”

that is when i sobbed

he could not stop himself

he said this over and over

i tried to console him

he could not control it

he punched me

i tried to hug him

he bit me

i tried to tell him i understand

he kicked me

“please bear, i am trying to be the best i can”

love

mom

I QUIT!

NO, THAT IS NOT DIRT

YES, WE HAVE BEEN DOING THIS FOR 11 YEARS

NO, IT DOES NOT GET ANY BETTER

YES, I STILL GAG

NO, I DON’T THINK IT IS AN AUTISTIC THING

IT’S A QUEEN THING

on a different note

bear realized he fits into my shoes now

bear is always asking to wear

“mom’s shoes”

luckily it is still just green flip flops

when it gets to the heels

well,

wouldn’t

that

be

a

sight