i wish i could just type a list of to-do things, and if you follow these few simple steps, your child will be wearing underwear with no accidents in one day.
then i would go on TV, yell during the whole infomercial, finishing with a firm, finger pointing at you.
yes you, the consumer.
unfortunately it is a game of guessing, guessing wrong, then right, then wrong, then right, then finally trained.
with keats i had put him in underwear on different occasions, but he just did not get the concept and was not ready, so pushing him was really useless.
when he was 4.5 years old, he decided that he did not want to wear pull ups anymore.
we put underwear on him, and luckily it was summer outside, so we let him run around in underwear and when he had to pee, the great outdoors were his toilet.
mastering the bowel movements took a little longer, but within three days he was potty trained.
he was easy, he could talk a little.
queen was 6 years old when we started finding her pull ups all over the house
sometimes filled with little surprises we would rather not be surprised with.
she decided on martin luther king jr. holiday that she wanted to be free at last.
i went and bought her some underwear and I also bought her a commode.
yes, a commode.
the portable potty of old people.
queen was afraid of the toilet and who could blame her?
we were asking her to sit on something cold, loud, and flushes things away that were never seen again.
there is not guarantee that she would not be next.
i mean look at what happend to the klingons in all those star trek jokes!
even though she was 6 years old, she was at approximately a 2 year old developmental level and 2 years old are afraid of the toilet.
we started by putting the commode out during her movie time and just having her sit on it the whole time.
She did not mind, it was a nice chair that she could jump up and down then sit right back down.
who doesn’t wish they could just pee without having to wait until commercial?
oh, be honest!
the very first time she peed, the look on her face was priceless.
she could not believe that not only had something just come out of her body, but it made a sound too.
we cheered her on like you would not believe.
queen was completely non-verbal at this time and did not like to sign anything that she did not feel worth her time.
we had to start by reading her, looking for the potty dance.
yes, it was time consuming, but on the plus side, our 18 month old wanted to be just like her big sister so they sat side by side, queen on her commode and chicka on her little potty chair, potty training together.
when it was not movie time we would put her on every 20 minutes until she figured out what was going on.
above all she liked the tinkle her sprinkle made when it hit the water in the commode.
which always reminds me of my cousin’s sign in her bathroom
if you sprinkle when you tinkle
be a sweetie
wipe the seatie
it also became a new obsession to make that sound.
when queen had accidents, which she did, we did not get mad at her or make her agitated by scolding her, we told her it was okay accidents happen.
how many unexpected pregnancies start with that line?
we don’t know how much queen understood, but we have always talked to her like she could.
it took about two weeks for her to be completely trained.
i would like the world to know that any poopie underwear were immediately thrown away
my psyche was worth the purchase of another package of underwear.
i don’t know why I remember so vividly the day bear decided to wear underwear.
it was sunny outside, the sun was streaming though the kitchen window making our yellow and orange kitchen even brighter
it was also president’s day weekend
our children seem to like national holidays to begin controlling their bladders.
i was trying to put pull ups on bear
he was fighting me, which was odd, because he did not like to be naked one bit at the time.
i looked up at him and said “You don’t like these do you?”
He just smiled.
i ran and got a pair of Keat’s underwear and put them on him, going to the store later that day for bear to pick out his particular brand of skivvies
he was 8 years old.
as with queen, we bought him his own commode for the same reason.
as with keats, it was spring so the great outdoors became his urinal.
he has the same pee bush to this day.
The pee bush has not survived and we have chosen not to replant it.
the pee bush, as i am writing this, has made spectactular come back from the grave.
we are testing bear’s pee for any miracle qualities we have somehow over looked.
we have come to the realization that a privacy fence is needed in our yard.
something about an after dinner pee calls out to our little outdoors man.
we used the exact same methods as we did with queen and again as with queen, we had another little girl that wanted to be just like her big brother who was potty trained at the exact same time.
the bowel movements took literally over two years to finally conquer.
he still uses his commode but calls it his “Gotta go poop potty chair.”
we travel quite a bit and Ben has a bladder the size of a Nat, so we have taught him to pee in a bottle in the car.
he loves to do this and I am sure we are not doing any future drivers any favors when bear is riding with them and suddenly starts peeing in a water bottle.
i wish i could give so much more information, lists, steps, and ideas.
all it took was love, patience, and persistence.
listen to your child, they will tell you when they are ready even without using words.
nothing has been more fun than seeing queen and bear run around in underwear when they were first starting to train because we just did not know if they were ever going to be able to.
but nothing can beat not having poop-filled pull-ups or underwear to clean.
AMEN AND AMEN.